Saying goodbye to Lucy: The end of our first foster placement

When we agreed to foster Lucy we knew how difficult it would be to let go of her, but we have always had to bear in mind that this time would come and prepare ourselves mentally for it.

Achieving the right level of attachment can be very hard when fostering, and as Lucy was our first foster child the process was really a learning curve for my family. 

We treated Lucy like a member of our family and did our best for her, as we wanted her to feel loved during her time with us. However, it was important to keep a certain amount of emotional distance, and accept that although we feel an emotional bond to her, she won’t be a part of our family forever.

Lucy’s birth mother is now in a position to care for her again, and we know that it is best for Lucy to be with her real mother.  It has been wonderful to see her flourish and grow in confidence since she came to live with us, and I hope Lucy will continue to do well at school now that her mother can care for her properly.

We know it is important to stay positive for Lucy and talk about how wonderful it will be for her to return to her home, as her well-being must come before our own. We would like Lucy to email us and stay in touch if her mother is comfortable with this, as we would love to keep up our bond with her.

We were lucky to have such a lovely, well-behaved child when we fostered Lucy, but we are ready to accept that our next fostering experience may not go so smoothly.

Our family will be very sorry to lose Lucy, but we wish her well and hope that she is happy when she returns to her biological mother. 

If you are considering fostering, I recommend you read some fostering stories, to get a better idea of what the everyday reality of foster care might be.

Have you fostered? How do you cope when it is time for a child to move on? If you are a foster parent I would love to hear from you.